books, personal

a series of updates, book reviews, and advice

In regards to the current books in my life:

I am out of my reading slump! It’s a fucking miracle! I did not read, like, all summer. I read casually, like short blurbs of non-fiction or magazines. I don’t have any idea why my brain decided that it loved reading again. I woke up a few days ago and was like Fuck, I miss books. I felt so uncomfortable with myself the entire time I was in that slump. It was a constant war of “I want to read, I need to read, I can’t read”. I’d start a chapter of something and my attention span would direct me elsewhere. It felt so unhealthy. Books are one of the best forms of therapeutic activity for me, other than listening to music and getting tattooed.  Not to mention, I could feel my fucking brain cells dying a little every day. Honestly? I think it was the pre-wedding stress that was making me way more attention-deficit. Weddings are stressful as shit and one of my main anxiety symptoms is restlessness so if I had to use the logical side of my brain, I would guess that a solid portion of my reading slump was stress-based. I don’t know if I talked about this before but I’m an over-analyzer who deals with every hypothesis and conclusion on the right side of my brain. So, I use logic and sound reasoning a lot more than I like to admit, but the emotive side usually does the talking for me. Due to the fact that I’m either a ball of rage or annoyed, I think my emotions usually present themselves in a way that’s more of a warning, less of an invitation. Anyway, let’s talk about books, baby.

I just finished the Leaf Reader by Emily Arsenault today. It was an easy read for me and very compelling so I kind of flew through it. I liked the main character and I felt like the other characters were really complex and layered, which is great since I feel like so many side characters are allowed to have three defining traits that determine the entirety of their purpose. The premise is extremely interesting and has actually prompted me to take an interest in learning how to read tea leaves in my downtime. (This means that fuckweasel is going to be dragged to a pottery painting workspace so that I can make a tasseography cup! Yay, fuckweasel!) The ending was the only part of the story that I didn’t like. I felt like I should have been expecting something way more sinister and it kind of fell more on the meh spectrum than I had hoped for. I was very close to figuring out the mystery but eventually decided not to care, since I was going to find out at some point. I also hated Matt with a passion, so that dampened the story a bit.

Solid 3/5 stars.

I am listening (thanks to the lovely folks at Audible) to All the Crooked Saints by The Stiefvs. This book is gorgeous. I love all the characters, especially Beatrice and Pete. I read in an interview of hers that Beatrice was modeled after the Myers-Briggs type, INTJ, which is what I am! I can also be an INFJ, depending on the day, but my scale usually tips to the Thinking side. Anyway, the story is beautifully crafted in classic Stiefvater style and just like all her other stories, it’s completely unique and authentically creative. I’m a little over halfway through and I am more emotionally invested than I ever wanted to be. Speaking of our lord and savior, Maggie S., she’s also teasing us with snippets from the Dreamer trilogy, aka the continuation of my male-counter part’s story with the love of my life, Adam Parrish. Although, I still miss Kavinsky. More than I should at this point in my life but hey, there are way worse destructive behaviors I could indulge myself with (not that I don’t already but moderation is key, kids).

I picked up An Enchantment of Ravens by Margaret Rogerson today. I have been waiting to read this book F O R E V E R.

Here’s the synopsis:

 

Isobel is a prodigy portrait artist with a dangerous set of clients: the sinister fair folk, immortal creatures who cannot bake bread, weave cloth, or put a pen to paper without crumbling to dust. They crave human Craft with a terrible thirst, and Isobel’s paintings are highly prized. But when she receives her first royal patron—Rook, the autumn prince—she makes a terrible mistake. She paints mortal sorrow in his eyes—a weakness that could cost him his life.

Furious and devastated, Rook spirits her away to the autumnlands to stand trial for her crime. Waylaid by the Wild Hunt’s ghostly hounds, the tainted influence of the Alder King, and hideous monsters risen from barrow mounds, Isobel and Rook depend on one another for survival. Their alliance blossoms into trust, then love—and that love violates the fair folks’ ruthless laws. Now both of their lives are forfeit, unless Isobel can use her skill as an artist to fight the fairy courts. Because secretly, her Craft represents a threat the fair folk have never faced in all the millennia of their unchanging lives: for the first time, her portraits have the power to make them feel.

Doesn’t that just sound like some shit I’d be into? I am so fucking excited to read this book. Plus the title? Ravens are my shit, man.

10/10 will keep you posted.

Lastly, I’ve been thumbing through Witch by Lisa Lister. It’s a pseudo-spellbook with a heavy sense of female empowerment. I have been highlighting passages like crazy and it will probably end up being my manifesto for a while. The author cusses a lot and I really appreciate that on a deep, spiritual level. I strongly recommend it for people who are newly discovering witchcraft or are trying to rediscover their own which brings me to the topic of…

In regards to my witchcraft practices: 

Firstly, I have an appointment to get a very witchcraft related tattoo tomorrow. I just wanted to tell you that because tattoos are always exciting. I also have another tattoo appointment to get Johnny Cash quotes with my godmother (who also practices). I did a lot of tarot readings in a short amount of time and apparently, I attract the Magician card. I am not fucking with you, it showed up in every reading; whether it was a card in the spread or it fell out into my lap, it was there. It pissed me off. For those of you who don’t know, the Magician “is a master of all trades, resilient to what the world throws at him, a reminder that your power is larger than your physical body”. It’s basically someone who has mastered their magic, their emotions, their logic, and their work. I am not a balanced person so I’m sure most people would have seen that and been like “Get your shit together” but I saw it and was like “Fuck, I need to get back into doing some serious witchcraft and also, I should get a tattoo of this card.”

No one ever said I was of sound mind.

So, here we are in the middle of my favorite month and with the veil thinning more and more each day. You bet your ass that I’m working on making my craft a little stronger each day. I did have a regular customer ask me if I had a broom to go with my hair and choice of clothing. In addition, I had a quiz on the internet tell me that I’m a “wild shadow witch” so I guess you could say I’m doing okay with it.

Today, I made a french press and persimmon cookies to honor the dead. Honoring the dead is something that I have a particular skill in throughout the entirety of the year but when that veil is lifting, I basically throw parties. My Mimi and I shared October and coffee and persimmon cookies.

In regards to my marriage / personal life: 

Marriage isn’t any different. I don’t say that to be a dick, but we’ve been doing this for so long and with such intention to make it work that it’s not like anything actually changed. Fuckweasel has been working very long hours so I’ve been an extra crazy housewife, cleaning schedule and all. We were going to start looking at houses but he wants to hold off for a couple of years and I’m totally okay with that. I love our apartment (even though I’m fairly certain that we have a ghost now, it’s a long story) and I just want him to be happy and comfortable (fuck off, he’s my best friend). I haven’t legally changed my name yet because its such a big pain in the ass but I’m going to get that process started while I finish our thank-you notes. I’ve been cooking like a fucking lunatic. I’m working on getting the hang of our cast iron skillet and sometimes my chicken is a little overdone but I would rather NOT get salmonella, so its a fair trade. Here’s a list of my most recent cooking adventures:

  •  Chicken piccata
  • Quinoa and red pepper power bowls
  • Alfredo pasta with bacon and sauteed mushrooms
  • Creamy lemon salmon
  • Crushed potatoes with an herb and olive oil dressing
  • Orange and spice salmon
  • Creamy citrus chicken
  • Persimmon cookies
  • Parmesan cauliflower bites
  • Avocado fries

There’s more but I think you get the gist. I’ve been cooking a storm up in this bitch. I wouldn’t call myself a skilled chef by any means but I enjoy the cathartic aspect of cooking and its a really fantastic creative outlet.

In other news, photography class is my favorite thing ever, other than tattoos and motorcycles. Someday, I hope to take pictures of tattoed people riding motorcycles so maybe all my true loves will intersect in the future. I struggle hard with Photoshop but I don’t really plan on utilizing anything other than Lightroom, so it’s okay.

In regards to other aspects of my life that you may or may not give a fuck about: 

  • Found out my temperament is choleric, which further adds to the Slytherin / Capricorn dominant / INTJ / wild shadow witch thing that I’ve got going on.
  • I’m trying a new acne regimen. For those of you who read this and know me outside of the interwebs, I have struggled with adult acne for about 6 years now. Nothing has actually ever worked, including birth control and seeing a dermatologist. This regimen comes HIGHLY recommended for people with hormonal issues like me (PCOS and Endo are a bitch, guys) so wish me luck. I’ll be doing before/ after pictures and cataloging any improvements and setbacks.  Be prepared to see my dumb fucking face more often. I’m extremely self-conscious about my acne because I had perfect skin growing up and then my face was a spontaneous war zone. I’ve given up certain foods to make my acne better and that is some serious bull shit. Stay tuned.

 

Thank you to all of you fucks who still check this shit out even though there’s no designated posting schedule. Y’all are the real MVP and I look forward to gracing you with my shining personality every time that I start writing.

That’s all there is,

The Book Witch

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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books, personal

hello, it’s me (back from the dead)

Thank you to everyone who has been patiently waiting for me to post again; my fiance and I have been in the process of finding an apartment, packing all of our shit, and moving said shit for the past two months.

I have a lot to catch you guys up on. I have two new tattoos – a thestral and a crown of thorns. We live in a brand new place, and so far, I absolutely love it. Jay graduated so we’ve been navigating that. My car broke down on the day we moved all of our furniture – so we’ve been carpooling ever since. I have a fuck ton of pictures to show you guys. But first, I wanted to tell you why I didn’t write while we were moving. Firstly, I work a shit ton. Spare hours are hard to come by and I was basically managing every aspect of our transport by myself so Jason could finish his classes in peace. There were not a lot of free seconds to devote to writing, unfortunately. Secondly. my space is so crucial to my sanity. I’m an introvert, an INTJ on some days, and an INFJ on others. I am an autumnal spirit who needs solitude and peace before I can function like a person. I also have OCD and anxiety, so everything must be in its proper place. (When I say I have OCD, I don’t mean that I’m afraid of germs and dirt. I mean that I have a little voice inside my head that the psychiatrist I went to actual said “Why didn’t you tell me about this earlier? You have classic Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and no one has ever diagnosed you properly, so that sucks”) My personal space is so fucking crucial to my mental health. My home is where I go to recharge, it’s my witch’s cottage, my castle. Don’t fuck with my home or the inhabitants.)

I strongly believe my first home was a song. Maybe it’s because I was raised under the wings of two Cancers but “home” is a very fluid term for me. Maybe it’s because I spend so much time trying to reign in the fireworks under my skin that “home” has shifted from person to object to lyric so frequently.

Anyway, my first home was a song. It was the only thing that held a glimmer of safety and I tucked myself under the lyrics and stayed there until I was strong enough to be my own crescendo. That song was “Skinny Love” by Bob Iver. I know! You were expecting something by Johnny Cash, hang on, it’s coming. Wait for your fucking turn. You can tell me forty thousand times that Skinny Love is about unrequited love, which, for some, it might be. For me, Skinny Love has always been about suicide and depression.

I’m going to tell you a secret. It’s not so much a secret now because the shame is wearing off and replacing itself with something more vicious.

The years between my thirteenth and nineteenth years of my life saw NINE suicide attempts. You read that right, fuck off. I don’t really want to talk about them but they were never supposed to not work so let’s just leave it at this: I’m really horrible at committing suicide. Kind of like how I’m horrible at communication or not using “fuck” as a filler word. I can point out the lines in Skinny Love that helped me recover the next morning after I downed a bottle of narcotic pain pills. I can point out the lines that I sang along to with red-rimmed eyes and panic attacks crawling under my skin. This sucks to talk about so let’s finish on a high note – Skinny Love was something that I always thought was written for me. Not in an egotistical, people-are-writing-songs-about-me way but in “Listen, you sad little bitch, the universe is trying to tell you something”

Hence, my latest tattoo. When I got my thestral patronus, I thought “Fucking perfect, I’m a morbid piece of shit with a death pony as a spirit animal. Who could love that?” Who will love you, who will fight? This leads me into a brief discussion of my second home: myself. I never really cared for myself as an object of permanence until I started decorating the walls. I think my partial sleeves actually started my journey into self-acceptance. Not self-love, that’s a work in progress.  I have all these pieces of my soul etched on my skin and it gives me great comfort to know it’s giving everyone a forewarning before they talk to me.

The other tattoo I got, my crown of thorns, lives ever-so-happily on my middle finger of my right hand. It’s a homage to two things – Johnny Cash’s cover of Hurt and my Catholic upbringing. I’ve always felt like us reformed Catholics wear a crown of thorns. My crown is formed of guilt and grief. I’m sure there are other ties that bind us to our thrones, but those are mine.

Thirdly, as you can probably guess, I find a home in the books that I love. They become part of me, so I cover myself in them. I cover my shelves with them, my bathtub is lined with them. If I ever saw someone trying to hurt one of my books, they would get a right hook to the jaw.  Harry Potter, Wicked Lovely, Looking for Alaska, and the Raven Cycle are series that I consider to be especially comfortable.

Lastly, I find my home in other people. Before you get all judgy and start accusing of being a false prophet of introversion,  let me tell you something – I am very particular with the people that I settle into. Above all things that I am proud of, I am most proud of the fact that when I decide to love something or someone, I love them with all that I have. I made a home for myself within the confines of maybe four or five people, tops. One of them is my sister and one of them is Jason. Jason is a very interesting choice of residence, as I am always so sure that we could break each other entirely.  My OCD makes me think I am the catalyst to his destruction, my tarot cards say I am the catalyst for his resurrection.

By the way, my sister gave birth to my goddaughter on June 2nd. Little Annabelle Jade, my little Gemini trickster queen.

So now Jason and I have a tiny 900 square foot fortress and in turn, I have other dwelling places within that home.

I feel as if a home has a different definition to every individual, but I always think of it as a place where I can tell the truth of myself without judgment, a place where I can let my magic reign free with no fear of consequence.

Here are some pictures of my tiny home

deskliving roomravenwitch

Yes, that IS a Ronan Lynch quote above my witchcraft station. Call me morbid but I thought “Not death but his brother, sleep” was a perfect addition to my bedroom. Fight me, I dare you. Did I happen to mention that I got my DNA test back? Guess who is 65% Irish with a Russian and Bulgarian twist. It explains my kinship to the Lynches and Kavinsky.  It also explains my intolerance to the sun, weather above 60 degrees, the spectrum of human emotion, and my love of Jameson.

Speaking of books, I finished Labryth Lost and it was surprisingly really good.  The lore was interesting to read about and I appreciated the way the main character was written. I was surprised by the romantic twist but it was one of my favorite LBGT moments thus far in a book. I also read Diary of a Haunting and it was an easy read but the ending actually snuck up on me a bit. I am having a super hard time getting into A Court of Wings and Ruin, I think because I honestly prefer the Throne of Glass series and I think Aelin and Rowan could kick Feyre and Rhys’ ass. Fun fact: I like slow burn books IF YOU COULDN’T ALREADY TELL.

While we’re on the topic of my favorite literary couples, can we have a moment of silence for all the Dreamer trilogy niblets that Maggie keeps dropping? Not going to lie, I cry when I see them. I save them to my phone and look at them when I need a moment of cathartic release.

I’m currently listening to The Song of Achilles on Audible and reading a physical copy of  My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She’s Sorry and I have already picked out which quotes I’m going to get added to my Book Sleeve. These books are going to destroy me, I can sense it.

I will start blogging more often, I promise. I’ll have to give reviews of the books I’m reading now and keep updating everyone on my domestic bullshit. I’m back in business for tarot readings since I have more privacy, so tell your friends.

That’s all there is,

The Book Witch

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We Are Okay Review + Birthday Shenanigans

Sup, mofos.

My 22nd birthday was yesterday so I’ve been super busy in anticipation of that particular event. For those of you wondering, I went to a Death Cab for Cutie concert on Thursday night AND IT WAS MAGICAL AS FUCK. I’ve been to concerts before and I really enjoyed them. I’m a music-oriented person. Nine out of ten times I’m going to remember something in terms of what songs were playing or what songs were popular at that period of my life. So, concerts are a good place for me. Being introverted has its drawbacks in the sense of really, really hating fucking crowds but I’m also a super aggressive and angry introvert and that balances me out a bit. Anyway, it was magical. It was one of those times when you get goosebumps because suddenly everyone is singing along to a song that you used to fall asleep to and the nostalgia is tangible. I was amazed at how alive I felt during the concert and my friend that took me (an early birthday present, bless her) was just as stoked, which was awesome. I hella started tearing up during Soul Meets Body but it’s okay, we don’t have to talk about that. The moral of the story is that I am now a concert junkie – look out world, I just gained another tier of Crazy.

On my actual Womb Evacuation Anniversary, I spent the day getting completely fucking wrecked with my soul sister who happens to also have the same Womb Evacuation Anniversary. Jason has the stomach flu, though, so I had to cut my 10-hour drinking spree short. St. Paddy’s is such a fantastic day to be of legal drinking age and have a birthday because the amount of whiskey that one consumes is completely justifiable by saying “FUCK IT I’M IRISH”. I have definitely decided that I need to permanently ingrain my day of birth into my flesh by getting a Celtic tattoo. Sue me, I like body art.

A lot.

Okay, so here comes the nerdy part. I had a fucking amazing couple of days and then the bookish gifts started flooding in. I got my March package from my pen pal and she picked out some seriously rad looking reads for my library (because she’s a Virgo and I collect Virgos because they understand me). My incredibly sweet Uncle Grapes (it’s a long story, it’s fine. Everything is fine) sent me some money so I went straight to Barnes & Noble. I even got a year membership! No self-control! Also, for someone who has such immense tolerance for physical pain and alcohol, I sure don’t have any tolerance for people or expensive books. My boss (also a Virgo, I was not kidding when I say I collect them) found me amethyst bookends. She remembered that I saw them a few months back and didn’t feel like splurging so she went ahead and did me a solid. Here they are in their glorious and majestic as fuck nature.

book ends

They’re so pretty, I could just die.

So then, my mother-in-law presented me with a personal library kit and a book embosser. That’s right, I have a book embosser now. She got me a copy of The Scorpio Races because one can never have too much Stiefvater in their lives AND I EMBOSSED IT.

embosserlibrary kit

 

She used my fiance’s last name on the embosser and that made my cold, dead heart warm ever-so-slightly. I’m going to emboss everything I own and then if someone tries to run away with one of my precious babies I will hunt them down and emboss them, too.

Anyway, here’s a little snippet of my thoughts regarding We Are Okay (by Nina Lacour)

  • I read Hold Still a few years ago and really, really liked it so I expected the same kind of enjoyment from We Are Okay 
  • LBGT characters? Yes! Sign me THE FUCK UP. Gimme all the representation, all of it. 
  • It was a little tricky to get into, the story starts off pretty timid and vague but once I was in, oh boy, was I in.
  • Marin is extremely relatable; her grief is so realistic there were times that I thought I could hold it…if I was careful
  • The character development is astouding  – for real, some of the best CD I’ve ever read. You go from being like “Okay, what’s going on, send help” to being like “Something very profound just happened and I think I missed it because I was too busy watching these people unfold”
  • THE PLOT TWIST IS THE WORST THING EVER. Like okay, Nina. We get it, you like crushing people like ants under your feet but this is cool, too. There will be no spoilers ahead but I can tell you that the thing was revealed and I had to reread it because it was so unexpected.
  • It had a lovely nostalgic feel to it. There was such delicious descriptive language. It felt like road trips and Christmas and beach trips all rolled into a delightful little package of soul-crushing sadness.

 

I give it a solid 8/10 and highly recommend it for fans of contemporary fiction or who need to feel understood.

I also finished Anna Kendrick’s autobiography. It was good, I’m not a huge fan of biographies but I powered through it because I have a huge crush on her. It’s okay, I read her book. We’re friends now. You can definitely tell where she starts to get more confident in her story because she switches from objective storytelling to snarky asshole over the span of a couple pages. I’m just glad I finished it, to be honest. Her humor was so on point but I truly hate stories of Hollywood and fame. I detest them.

I am now looking for a new audiobook and trying to get through Truthwitch which is becoming better, the further I get into it.

I’ll talk to you guys when I’m done with my vacation so I hope you have a lovely week.

That’s all there is,

The Book Witch

 

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Young Wives’ Club Review & Tattoo Updates

Hello, loves.

Part of my crumbled, decaying soul settled yesterday. I got my Raven Cycle tattoo and it was a really amazing experience. I love, adore, and appreciate my artist. If you’re in the Reno area, I would strongly recommend going to Nichole at South Town Tattoo Collective. She’s amazing; I love how she talked to me the entire session. I could’ve told her anything about my life and felt like the information would’ve been safe and wrapped away for later. She said “I’m in love with this tattoo” and a part of my heart filled with joy. It was such a  strange cacophony of emotions; I was sad that I could never experience the magic of the Raven Cycle for myself, I was proud because she had told me that she loved doing my tattoos.  The universe created a strange synchronization where it played Blink-182 over the loud speaker and I’d like to think it was because I was wearing my favorite shirt. So maybe I did actually experience a bit of Cabeswater in that small corner of sketched goddesses and blood. I told her about my next idea and then asked if she was down to tattoo my knuckles. We plotted the designs together and I mentioned that my family wasn’t stoked about me covering my skin. I told her “You can’t raise someone to practice witchcraft and then  expect them to live a mundane existence”

She asked me about the Raven Cycle and what it was about and I panicked. “Uhhh, it’s about this girl who can’t kiss this guy but she sees him on this Corpse Road, which is on the ley lines and the guy is searching for a dead Welsh king. You might wonder ‘Why is he searching for a dead Welsh king? That’s extremely specific.’ Well, the answer is also extremely specific. Ronan Lynch is there and I care so much about Ronan that it fucking scares me. I also care a lot about Joseph Kavinsky and I don’t give a fuck what Gansey says, Joseph Kavinsky matters to me. Ronan is in love with Adam, who made a deal with a forest called Cabeswater. Joseph Kavinksy is in love with Ronan but he dies because, like me, he makes very poor decisions. Good old, Joey K. They’re all a little bit in love with each other, actually. Oh, and Ronan can pull shit from his dreams and he has a pet raven. There’s a houseful of psychics and their roommate is dead, man. This series changed me from a moderate car crash to absolute fucking train wreck. You need to read it.” We talked about cars and wedding plans and conventions because I can’t actually summarize books without having a meltdown, apparently.

Anyway, here’s a picture of my tattoo.

raven tattoo

My sister also got me a signed copy of The Raven King for my upcoming birthday because she’s an enabler. Just kidding, my sister is fucking rad. I wrote a sappy post about it and then I re-read the last chapters of TRK, cried, had a drink, and went to bed holding the aforementioned copy of TRK. Here we are, being nerds. Her with her normal person hair and my purple bob.

sister.jpg

My “Joseph Kavinsky Matters” bag arrived aaaaaannnnd I ordered more stickers. Don’t judge me. I love my sisters. Look, my laptop has its own JKM sticker, too!

kavinskykavinsky.jpg2

Fuck off, I don’t have a problem.

In other less-obsessive news, I finished The Young Wives Club. 

Honestly, it was pretty disappointing. I would give it 2/10 stars and here’s why:

I definitely need to stick with creepy / darker books if I want to enjoy my experiences. I would recommend it to someone who wants something mindless and fluffy. The people in the story are not very smart and I wasn’t attached to them at all. Even during a death scene, not a major character, I was like meh, deserved it. I could predict everything they did and that’s not a good indicator of writing since I am slower than a sloth when it comes to plot twists. I was really excited for this book and I’m disappointed with how much I loathed the characters and the story. The ending was the only redeeming point – it was very Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants-esque and it almost (I say “almost” in the loosest way possible) seemed like some of them had learned their lessons. Very bland characters, very generic plot. Again, I would say that if you know you like literature with bite, just stick to it.

I have another book review coming to you this week! I’m looking for something amazing to read. I have some in my queue that I’m so excited to start. I tried to get into the Truthwitch but its falling short after reading Throne of Glass. I’m also attempting to finish Anna Kendrick’s memoir, Scrappy Little Nobody. It’s very lighthearted and sweet but I have a huge crush on her, so I’m enjoying it.

I will talk to you all later.

That’s all there is,

The Book Witch

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How We Find Ourselves In Books

For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why I was so drawn to the characters in the Raven Cycle series, especially Ronan or Kavinsky. They’re so contradictory and prickly, what could I possibly see in them, especially Ronan? 

Well, my friends, the mystery is solved: it’s because I, small and hateful angry bean, AM RONAN LYNCH. 

For the love of fuck, look at this shit!

ronan

I dress like that on accident, man! That is an actual face that I make at other human beings. (I’m the one on the left, by the way. I know some of you probably didn’t know that)

How many times have we fallen in love with a book or a series because we resonate so closely with the characters? I’ve been devoured by these books, turned completely inside out, chewed up, and spit back out. It’s like looking into a mirror and seeing yourself in typewriter font.

For example, here is the List of Things That I Have In Common With Ronan Lynch Because I Need More Reasons To Stay Awake At Night 

  • trust fund babies
  • literally, we’re just privileged assholes with no verbal filters
  • my birthday falls on St. Patricks’ Day aka the Irish Day; Ronan is Irish af
  • taste in music that everyone fucking hates
  • don’t talk to us when we have headphones on, don’t touch our tattoos
  • give us a something fast and we’re happy
  • or, give us music and alcohol and we’ll be restless but better
  • we both lost parents and turned into bitter douche canoes
  • we will both end your life if you fuck with our baby brothers
  • or our friends
  • fucking with my friends is a sure-fire way to get your life ended
  • wear black and keep our resting bitch faces on point but are really full of feelings
  • a LOT of feelings
  • both think our boyfriends are some sort of godlike angel when in reality we are dating huge nerds
  • super sensitive to all things. don’t deny that Ronan Lynch is a sensitive mofo, he literally won’t let Gansey boy make other friends
  • both of us have had Kavinskys in our lives; we ended up not being with them because they were toxic af and would’ve ruined our shit
  • love our dads very much
  • treat our pets like children
  • NIGHT TERRROOORS
  • like no friends but really fond of the ones we have
  • beings of rage and love
  • raised on a farm
  • raised Catholic AF
  • hates most things, including ourselves
  • is either dropping the F-bomb, flipping you off or being sarcastic
  • actual trophy wives
  • would rather die than hurt someone we love
  • PTSD, depression, and anxiety up the wazooo

There’s more, a lot more, but that’s the general gist of my argument. We fall so hard for these characters because we see ourselves in them. We love them when we cannot love our own souls. They are catalysts to the breaking of our hearts and the slow, aching awareness that brings us back to wholeness. The characters we love are constellations in the galaxies that reside in our bones.

I am so elated to be made up of these beings, these people that I will never meet. Their presence forces me to stop and remember my gushing affection or them and that reminds me to love myself, as well. The cycle is continuous and beautiful and my gratitude for the writers who penned the puzzle pieces of who I am is infinite.

I did actually pick up reading again – my book hangover has subsided a bit. I’m currently listening to We Are Okay by Nina LaCour and reading The Young Wives Club by Julie Pennel. I heard that you kind of need to force yourself to read again and that it really helps to pick something in a completely different genre. So, I guess I’ll read other books until my Dream Theif trilogy arrives. I GUESS.

In the meantime, I have my gorgeous new tarot cards, drawn by my Scorpio soulmate Maggie Stiefvater herself to work with. My favorite part of these cards is the accompanying book that comes with them – the translations are witty as hell. Its hard to find cards with translations that you actually resonate with! I swear this is a problem in the cartomancy community!

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I actually had dreams about ghosts and my cousin last night but the best part was that she greeted me with a Jersey accent, mimicking my problematic son Joseph Kavinsky, and said “DICK GANNNSSSSAAAAAY THE THIRD!!”. It was such a calming sensation, hearing a 17-year-old drug  Bulgarian  drug addict mobster’s voice come out of my 21-year-old, and very female, cousin’s voice box. I’m not kidding, I woke up and I was like “So this is how the pieces fall together”

I hope everyone has a book character that they love so much it causes them physical pain. I know that I have several, because life is a fucking nightmare. 

That’s all there is,

Carry on

The Book Witch

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The Worst Book Hangover EVER // My beloved male characters

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I FINISHED THE RAVEN CYCLE SERIES AND IT LEFT  GIANT, GAPING MAW THE SIZE OF RONAN LYNCH IN MY CHEST. 

I’m upset because its over and I’m extra upset because I feel like there’s literally no fandom for this. There’s not nearly enough fanfiction or Tumblr posts to tide me over until I die and have “I am being perfectly fucking civil” written on my tombstone. My cousin gets it, she read the series and I am very grateful that I have a single human  who I can text at 4 am with shit like “remember when Noah said he was ‘much more when he was alive’ because I remember and it hurts”

I loved all the characters so much. I really enjoy stories that focus on more than one character and have men as the focal point. I know that Blue is a huge part of the series but she fit so well into the weird fabric that is the Raven Boys, that I tend to lump them all together. I cannot begin to express how much I loved this series. I’m devastated that it’s over.

I heard, however, that Ronan is getting HIS OWN TRILOGY AND I AM VERY EXCITED. No one deserves that series like the middle Lynch child. Maggie talked about it in August, so we probably won’t see it for a while but it is reassuring that there will be a continuation for my small gay son. I have been buying A L L the Ronan Lynch merch. I kid you not, I made an appointment to get an RC tattoo the day after I finished the series and I’m FUCKING ECSTATIC to show everyone. My fiance is convinced that I am Ronan and he doesn’t know much about Adam… but if we’re comparing people to Raven Boys, lemme just say that Jason is the most Adam-y person there is.

Speaking of male humans that I love, I decided to turn this post into My Top Male Characters and Why They’re Sweet Babies Who Need Protection At All Costs. 

These are ranked from most favorite to “I will still fight someone for you, at some point” There are **SPOILERS** in this list. 

Here it is – the reasons that I can’t sleep, my precious angels.

  1.  RONAN LYNCH (The Raven Boys) – Whatever ninth circle of Hell that Ronan crawled out of, I came from the same one. Everything about him is admirable: his beautiful cussing poetry, his BMW, his love for his friends, the Murder Squash Song. Like Ronan, I too, enjoy driving things in illegal ways, shitty EDM, being “the friend with tattoos” and the loner. Ronan would totally be in Slytherin. He gets +20 points for having a raven as a sidekick. Also, he’s a really great example of a man who likes men but is allowed to keep his masculinity. I love him and I love his secret tenderness and generosity.  Bad boys with feelings, forever.
  2. JOSEPH KAVINSKY (The Raven Boys) – Hear me out, okay. I know that he’s kind of a piece of shit but he is the prime example of self-destruction and if I know something about anything, it is self-destructive habits. Poor K, who just loved Ronan and wanted Ronan to love him. I love how he uses humor to cover up his emotions because that’s my primary coping mechanism, too. He’s an asshole and I love him and it broke my heart that he died the way he did. #josephkaviskymatters2017 SAT that, Dick. 
  3. DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY – This is fairly self-explanatory. He’s the Slytherin-with-too-many-feelings poster child and my life would be a horrible, dark place without his overly-assertive existence. Come here, my precious douche-bag child. I love all the douche bags and I’m proud. 
  4. SETH MORGAN (Wicked Lovely) – Draco and Seth were my first book-boyfriends. He’s the kind of guy that girls dream of; the selfless best friend. I loved Seth from the start and I knew that he was going to end up being like “Here’s my life, babe. Just take it” Seth was so wise and humble, too. He needs All of the Love Forever. If he would’ve died, I would have gone with him.
  5. DORIAN HAVILLARD (Throne of Glass) – Protect him, please. I’m not gonna say much about him but if any of you who are reading this have any connection to Queen Maas… Please, just… spare my book-loving, magic-wielding nerd son. You can kill Chaol – just don’t touch my king cinnamon roll.
  6. TYRANNUS BASILTON GRIMM PITCH (Carry On) – Ah, yes. Another dark-souled, self-deprecating, asshole who turns out to be in love with The Golden Boy and hopelessly gay. Can you see the pattern, yet? 
  7. DEATH (The Arcana Chronicles) – Complete asshole with too many feels – not gay, but very relevant. His whole back story just sucks and he just keeps drawing the short end of the proverbial scythe.
  8. NEWT SCAMANDER – Terribly awkward beast mom. 10/10 would cuddle.
  9. RICHARD GANSEY III (Raven Cycle) – Honestly, he puts up with so much shit. I might think he’s a little bitch, sometimes, but like… he has been the Group Dad since Day 1 and will probably never stop… Adam straight went to him?! and was like?! Hey, can I date your daughter, Ronan?! I promise I won’t kill him?! and Gansey was like ‘Don’t you harm a hair on his angry, attractive head and I won’t have to pay someone to bury your body. Just kidding, here’s a $100… I’m happy for you, but really, he’s very sensitive”

 

Here are some photos of my new stickers! I have more coming! I love stickers!

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Shout out to Jason, who puts up with my book merch addiction and lets me use him as a photo prop. 10/10 would marry.

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Have a great week, everyone! Go read a book series that destroys the core of your being so that we can suffer together 🙂

 

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What I’m Reading + Bookish Tattoos

Hello, friends!

I bet you all thought since I got my laptop back I would be blogging a lot! W R O N G! But really, its not for any exciting reason, I just had a rough couple of weeks.

I did, however, get my Fuck Love tattoo.

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Here’s the caption that went with it:

“Let people feel the weight of who you are and let them deal with it” I will not be afraid of letting the reality of my existence take up space in the world. i will not apologize for my curves or the dichotomy of the sharp angles and softness of my hips. i will not dumb myself down to make you more comfortable. being ashamed of intelligence is a horrendous thing. i will not apologize for my purple hair, my tattoos, my done or undone face. i will never sacrifice my empathy, my ambition, or my ruthlessness. i won’t tell you i’m sorry for needing time away from other humans to feel whole again or for the books in my purse. i won’t be beat down for my truth – the splotchy mind of pock marked depression and OCD and panic disorder. i will not be ashamed of the bridge between lobes that confuses colors with numbers, my constant entanglement of senses. i won’tgive excuses for my love of kurt cobain and johnny cash. let me love what i need to, let me say what needs to be said. i am a ragged breath under a star filled sky.

Sorry for the blood!

I really felt at home in the tattoo shop I went to for this one; I liked my first artists because they were my friends prior to me being a client but I deeply loved something about Nichole. She reminded me of a winter fairy working in a tattoo shop, like stepping into the series that convinced me that tattoos were to be cherished and collected at all costs. I am stoked to finish the rest of my book sleeve.

I’m gonna have to include something from the Throne of Glass series since I finished Queen of Shadows last week and I felt something latch onto my soul. I love that fucking series. I cannot get over how much I love that series. Like holy shit, it is blowing my mind. I just love Aelin and Rowan and Manon and my sweet cinnamon roll Dorian. If my little #friendshipgoals group doesn’t survive this series I will personally end someone’s life as a payment for theirs. I still strongly dislike Chaol, strongly. Dislike. With. a. Passion.  Everyone talks about the Inner Circle of ACOTAR being the six best friends that anyone could ever have but have you met my sweET TERRASEN RULING COURT?! HAVE YOU MET THEM AND BASKED IN THE GLORY OF THEIR FRIENDSHIP?! I DID AND I FUCKING CRIED.

I even got a cute little Manon/ Dorian candle set! (I don’t have a problem)

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They smell like happiness and they make me smile, isn’t that enough for you?

I also got a new BuJo (or bullet journal as the academics might call it) that was inspired by Manon. Oh, and I have more stickers and a new wallet on the way, that are also ToG related. Can you tell who my favorite character is? I’ll give you two guesses. You’re probably also wondering what tea that is – it’s the Malfoy Tea Emporium’s flavor, Haunted Library. How can you scroll past a shop called Malfoy’s Tea Emporium with teas like Haunted Library, Queen of the Underworld, and Rhysand? Draco Malfoy deserved better. 

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Speaking of friendship goals, I’m almost 3/4 of the way through the Raven Cycle series and I just?! how?! does she write?! characters like?! THAT!!!! I am in love with all the sweet Raven Boys and Blue A N D the Grey Man AND everyone at 300 Fox Way and Kavinski for some weird, probably really deeply ingrained psychological issue. Its so intricate and amazing and has moved its way up into my Top 5 series, just like Throne of Glass. I’m gonna have to add the Raven Cycle to my book sleeve. I really love books that focus on more than one character, like the other characters are allowed to have pasts and fears and hobbies. I’m so madly, truly in love with the Steifvater and Maas write stories, they’re polar opposites and yet so many things are similar and both are so worthy of attention. Raven Cycle doesn’t seem to have as big of a fandom as ToG which bums me out because, again, I really liked Kavinski and I feel like I need to receive feedback as to whether that’s normal or not.

I finished Shade Me, the book about the girl with synesthesia trying to solve a mystery. It was… okay. She was a pretty lame character with lame love interests and lame enemies. The mystery was good and I liked how twisted it was but I was still left going “What the fuck? That doesn’t make any sense” at the end. I did appreciate the representation of synethesia, though. Its uncommon in books and its such a wicked way of having your brain wired. I have it mildly, and by mildly (insert Lemony Snicket voice), a word which here means, not as severe as this book character, I am referring to the fact that it still makes me want to rip my hair out from unwanted stimulus. I started Grave Mercy and it seems I have a thing for assassins or minions of death, in general.

I’ve been on a weird poetry kick lately and I found this gem at my town’s Barnes and Noble. 100_0144.JPGBy “this gem” I mean the Johnny Cash poetry collection. I cannot even begin to articulate how much I love Johnny Cash. He was my childhood friend and I will probably request “Highwayman” to play at my funeral. I will be getting a Johnny tattoo at some point.

Have a great weekend; I will hopefully have the time to write again, soon

Carry on,

The Book Witch

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